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All our jokes listing within the accountant jokes category are listed below. Click on any of the items to view the full joke.

1.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
"The auditors have just left, sir.""Did they check the books?""Very thoroughly.""What did they say?""They want 15% to ke... more

2.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A 54-year-old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one evening which read: "Dear Wife, I am 54 years old, and by the... more

3.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A business man was interviewing applicants for the position of divisional manager. He devised a simple test to select th... more

4.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A business owner tells her friend that she is desperately searching for an accountant.Her friend asks, "Didnt your compa... more

5.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A businessman hires a private detective to find a missing accountant.The detective tells him that he needs a description... more

6.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A businessman tells his friend that his company is looking for a new accountant.His friend asks, "Didnt your company hir... more

7.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A guy in a bar leans over to the guy next to him and says, "Want to hear an accountant joke?"The guy next to him replies... more

8.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A man walking along a country road comes across a farmer droving a huge mob of sheep. He stops and chats for a while and... more

9.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A Martian lands to plunder, pillage and burn. He goes up to the owner of the first house he sees and says, "Im a Martian... more

10.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A patient was at her doctors office after undergoing a complete physical exam. The doctor said, "I have some very grave... more

11.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A tourist, visiting a small town in Israel, came upon a statue dedicated to "The Unknown Soldier". At the base of the st... more

12.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A young accountant spends a week at his new office with the retiring accountant he is replacing. Each and every morning... more

13.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
A young accountant, straight out of uni, applies for a job advertised in the Sydney Morning Herald. He is interviewed by... more

14.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Accountant after reading nursery rhymes to his young child:"No, son. When Little Bo Peep lost her sheep that wouldnt be... more

15.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
An accountant goes into a pet shop to buy a parrot. The shop owner shows him three identical parrots on a perch and says... more

16.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor. "Doctor, I just cant get to sleep at night.""Ha... more

17.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
An accountant visited the Natural History museum. While standing near the dinosaur he said to his neighbor: "This dinosa... more

18.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
An auditor is checking the books of an airline. He is puzzled by the excess use of fuel on a Melbourne to Canberra fligh... more

19.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
An auditor was examining the balance sheet of a mining company that had just bought a sheep station in the Pilbara area... more

20.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
An internal auditor for a manufacturing group was concerned about anomalies in stock levels. He thought someone might be... more

21.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Conversation between two accountants at a cocktail party:".......and ninthly..."... more

22.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How can you tell when the Chief Accountant is getting soft?When he actually listens to Marketing before saying No... more

23.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How do you drive an accountant completely insane?Tie him to a chair, stand in front of him and fold up a road map the wr... more

24.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How do you know accountants have no imagination?They named a firm PricewaterhouseCoopers.... more

25.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How do you know when an accountants on holidays?He doesnt wear a tie to work and comes in after 8.30.... more

26.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How many accountants does it take to change a light bulb?"What kind of answer did you have in mind?"Two, one to change t... more

27.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How many auditors does it take to change a light bulb?How many did it take last year?... more

28.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
How many cost accountants does it take to change a light bulb?Hmmm........Ill just do a few numbers and get back to you... more

29.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
If an accountants wife cannot sleep, what does she say?"Darling, could you tell me about your work."... more

30.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Laws of Accounting1. Trial balances dont2. Bank reconciliations never do3. Working Capital does not4. Return on Investme... more

31.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Mr Evans was the Chief Accountant of a large manufacturing concern. Every day, on arriving at work, he would unlock the... more

32.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Once upon a time there was a beautiful oil company. All day long she loved to run up and down the share price list, laug... more

33.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Q: How many Accountants does it take to change a light bulb? A: What sort of answer did you have in mind ?A: None-just a... more

34.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Q: What is a Budget? A: An orderly system for living beyond your means.... more

35.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
The accountant had just read the story of Cinderella to his four-year-old daughter for the first time. The little girl w... more

36.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
The accountants prayer: Lord, help me be more relaxed about insignificant details, starting tomorrow at 10.53:16 am, Eas... more

37.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
The doctor comes to see his heart transplant patient."This is good news. It is very unusual, but we have two donors to c... more

38.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
The managing partner in an accounting firm is very annoyed with one of his junior partners and has called him in to chas... more

39.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
The young accounting graduate, fresh out of uni and knowing everything, applied for his first job. The prospective emplo... more

40.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
There are three kinds of accountants in the world.Those who can count and those who cant.... more

41.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
There once was an accountant who lived her whole life without ever taking advantage of any of the people she worked for.... more

42.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Three partners in an accounting firm go out to lunch. They are the audit partner, the tax partner and the senior partner... more

43.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
Two accountants are in a bank, when armed robbers burst in. While several of the robbers take the money from the tellers... more

44.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What do accountants suffer from that ordinary people dont?Depreciation.... more

45.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What do actuaries do to liven up their office party?Invite an accountant.... more

46.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What do you call an accountant who is seen talking to someone?Popular... more

47.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What do you call an accountant without a spreadsheet?Lost... more

48.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What does an accountant say when you ask him the time?Its 9.18 am and 12 seconds; no wait - 13 seconds, no wait - 14 sec... more

49.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What does an accountant use for birth control?His personality.... more

50.   Category: Accountant jokes  0 stars
What does CPA stand for?Cant Produce Anything... more





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